Last night I scanned my bookshelves looking for my long lost Weight Watchers materials. I found them tucked away neatly in the carrying case that I paid $19.99 for almost two years ago. The time I spent at WW wasn't a waste, it was a learning experience. I learned what portions are and how it feels to be hungry. I learned that I can lose weight. I learned that it's not easy and that there are a lot of us out there struggling with it.
That isn't what's on my mind though.
As I dusted off the Food Companions and checked to make sure my WW calculator still worked an envelope fell on the floor. As I picked up the stuffed envelope and turned it over to look at who it was addressed to, it came back to me. I remembered the night that I sat on my bed and through tears wrote a letter to a MIML nearly 3 years ago. As I sat down to read the letter I pulled out the 5 sheets of pink notebook paper. I tried to read the whole thing through to the end but I couldn't. It was so pathetic, so whiny- so not the person I see myself as today. Today I don't think I would write a letter like that to a MIML. Today and every day I come closer to understanding and believing the words in the poem that hang in my bathroom.
That isn't what's on my mind though.
As I dusted off the Food Companions and checked to make sure my WW calculator still worked an envelope fell on the floor. As I picked up the stuffed envelope and turned it over to look at who it was addressed to, it came back to me. I remembered the night that I sat on my bed and through tears wrote a letter to a MIML nearly 3 years ago. As I sat down to read the letter I pulled out the 5 sheets of pink notebook paper. I tried to read the whole thing through to the end but I couldn't. It was so pathetic, so whiny- so not the person I see myself as today. Today I don't think I would write a letter like that to a MIML. Today and every day I come closer to understanding and believing the words in the poem that hang in my bathroom.
Comes to Dawn
Author unknown
After a while you learn
The subtle difference
Between holding a hand
And chaining a soul...
And you learn
That love doesn't mean security,
And you begin to learn
That kisses aren't contracts
And presents aren't promises.
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of a woman
Not the grief of a child...
And you learn to build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow's ground is
Too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way of falling down
In mid-flight.
After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you bask too much
So you plant your own garden
And decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn
That you really can endure
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth.
And you learn...
With every goodbye
You learn.
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