This morning I awoke to the river of life gushing between my legs warm and wet onto my white Hanes. The brief moment of sadness caught me by surprise. This is my first month off of the pill in nearly a decade and I wasn't really sure when it was coming but the reality is that it could have not come. I haven't been reckless but nothing in life in foul proof.
Even as I waited and waited for it to arrive the weekend I didn't feel anxious about it's lack of presence. That also shocked me but deep down I know why - J is a great guy and would make an awesome dad. While I'm relieved that parenthood will have to wait it felt kind of nice to think about carrying his child.
